Eat Shit and Die

 You know who you are. You wear the mask of cooperation and friendship hiding a face of deceit, envy and frustration. You smile, you promise, you talk too much, you are in a hurry. It's no accident you have a saw in your pocket when we crawl out on the limb. To all of you...Eat Shit and Die ! To you, who surface everytime we come up with a new product or activity, find your place on our roster.

You go to Europe to race with us and conspire to copy our racing frames. You tell our suppliers we have authorized the release of proprietary parts to you. We airfreight you turbos and you never pay for them. You take our parts , copy them and then return them saying they were no good. We build prototypes for production approval and you have them copied by other firms or even better yet you sell them and never pay us at all. You borrow turbo kits from our clients, tell us you want to buy them but need tech info, then you copy the parts and tell the world you are the new savior. You order parts, stop payment, run your dyno tests and send us back beat up used parts. We sponsor your bike, tune your bike and find out our name is nowhere to be found on the entry or when the record is set. We go to the awards dinner when you set two world records after we spend thousands of dollars and driving thousands of miles getting the record and you don't acknowledge our presence. You remove our decals from our products when we aren't around. You set a 200 mph record and our name never appears on your turbo web page.

You order parts for a custom turbo application and get "investors" or "sponsors" money to order parts from us. We provide finished parts and raw parts for your own fabrication and to our knowledge you did nothing. You then demand we refund your money because your "investors" were going to have you "put in jail" and you said send the money and then you will return the parts. We said return the parts and we will refund for what has not been damaged or altered. You never return the parts. For the next decade you rant about what crooks we are. We keep our mouth shut about it and let you rant. Ian.

We find out you are advising people not to do business with us so we call you up and ask since we've never had any dealings with you it would be better to either keep quiet or call us up first before you spread rumors. We then remind you we know all of your three previous employers whom you left under less than favorable circumstances and also know people with whom we you know have had bad business dealings with. We invite you to stop by and discuss these issues since you are local. You decline. John N.

We contacted you to purchase some high end electronics because you were supposedly the local expert...And, since you were half an hour from our shop, communication should have been easy. There was no communication. Zero. We forked over the money and after five months of excuses and no delivery, mainly blaiming supplier issues, we made one simple phone call and found the parts we ordered were in stock  both in the USA and UK offices.  A visit with the President and now CEO of Cosworth quickly cleared up things regarding your business and practices. A few more phone calls found a long trail of lies, excuses, overbilling, and non-delivery with a range of clients. Bad business practices and pre-payments to float a failing business. We took a partial refund after a deduction for some ill-fitting, subcontracted, wiring work and moved on.

You order expensive special order parts , and try to cancel the order after we have eight weeks of labor and thousands of dollars of parts tied up in the effort. You beat up our parts because some other custom part interferes and then return them threatening us unless we refund all your money. You call us up and demand we change our designs to your specifications even though you've never made any parts and aren't aware of the expenses involved. The race is over you steal the parts and head for Canada. Your "expert" hooks up things wrong and you try to blame us for your mistakes. You want to turbo your bike but won't pay us to do it because you are a "turbo guru" so we sell you a turbo and a year later you come back saying you don't know how and you want us to "do it"...We "do it" three times because you keep changing your mind and you reward us by calling up other customers of ours telling them to cancel their commitments with us so only "your bike" will be in our shop...then you deny you did so. Well we went out on the limb for you and you chopped it off. Karma being what it is your limb got chopped off, unfortunately not on the shifter side. Mike Chestnut.

You call us up to complain about a product that is not ours. We explain we have nothing to do with it at all. You tell us you are filing complaints with the Better Business Bureau, a complaints board, and various national internet communites. We suggest you go back to school, take a course in logic, learn about decision matrices and figure out that, if we are not part of the equation, we have nothing to do with whatever you are talking about. We then get a phone call that offers to clear our name in this matter for $1,000.00. Ha!

We give you 5MB of software, 40 pages of instructions and you think screaming at us will cure your inability to read or study. You run leaded fuel thru the O-Sensor then complain to us that: a. Your O-Sensor is "bad". b. Your bike runs poorly. We give you free this and free that totaling about $3,000.00 and then you stiff us on a $50.00 bill to cover the shipping. You build billet parts, call us up wanting to sell our exhausts...We lend you some parts for photography and testing and you never call us or return our calls, then copy the parts and refuse to either pay for or give back the missing items...Money is your God and He can turn on you faster than you think. You order $1,350.00 worth of parts on package deal for $1,100.00 and 1 1/2 years later you call us up wanting a full refund on one of the parts you never used...We keep records. You don't return the prom dress after the prom. You call up thinking we don't remember who you are because it was 5 or 10 years since you last surfaced...and we remind you of what happened before. Your bike is going to be in a magazine and you are really going to help us! Ha! EAT SHIT AND DIE!